Taylor Lautner doesn't get AbductedToday, instead of your regularly scheduled Dead-Beef programming, we thought we’d bring you something a little different.

A little while back…well, a long while back in September 2011, actually…our pals over at the Unknown Studio held a contest looking for new contributors to their show. Because I’m needy and crave attention, I quickly jumped on the opportunity and created a segment called “Tortured Cinema,” a show that reviewed very shitty movies. I called the wonderfully talented Sally Poulsen and said “let’s watch a really bad movie and review it!” she said “what movie?” and I said “Abduction starring Taylor Lautner!” and then she hung up.

When I explained to Sally I was going to enter our audio review to the Unknown Studio contest and that we would soon be rich and famous beyond our wildest imaginationings, she agreed.

As it turns out the Unknown Studio doesn’t like things that are cool and awesome, so we didn’t win the contest. However, recently one of my favourite podcasts, How Did this get Made?, reviewed Taylor Launter’s Abduction, which inspired me to share the mothballed audio segment we created many months ago, back when the film was new in theaters. Enjoy!

Click Here to listen to the review of “Abduction”